from kiyong's blog of creative pursuits

It’s just been ONE OF THOSE WEEKS. I don’t know what happens: everything lined up like clockwork. You keep going. You do your stuff. Have meetings. Ferry children. Deliver presentations. Teach. Mark. 

(AND manage to meet with a friend or two — hurray! Though what they thought of this wild-eyed woman sitting across from them, who knows…)

But it’s the dead end of winter, and everywhere you go people are complaining: it’s freezing. The biting cold wind. You’re complaining too: I’m shattered.

The children are complaining: you’re never home! I’m stressed! I’m too tired! 

Everybody wakes up and goes to bed looking wan.

So I hit Thursday and sort of collapse. Collapse a bit more yesterday. To where I physically ache, can hardly move around the house. 

Not illness. Just sheer flipping exhaustion.

***

This morning however when I let the cats out, I notice the air has turned. That edge of spring. And like some kind of underground bulb myself, I can begin to feel the lure of the garden, the promised warmth, despite how overgrown and wet and messy it is right now. I see outside the pot at the base of our garden wall suddenly has some colour: of course, I’d forgotten in the grey of the long winter that purple crocuses emerge there, followed in April by the ink-splattered looking leaves of the wild orchid that planted itself there seven years ago. I never move the pot. Never do anything but pluck the old stems out at the very last minute. I daren’t! And am rewarded in time by the appearance of the primeval-seeming leaves…

***

Meanwhile, in the house of blood sugar levels, things are somewhat better. We have two theories for the huge run of lows (in addition to the performance-equals-lots-of-glucose needed theory from the week before!) last week:

1) site change for the infusion set. Greater absorption across the board?

2) pancreas spluttering. There is growing research to show that if there is good blood sugar control in early diagnosis, this can seem to preserve some beta cell (insulin producing) function. We have been lucky with this good control (and received good support early) — and some of the price paid may be an irregular production of said insulin. 

However you slice it, it’s a game played in hindsight. Sigh. The set changed again on Wednesday, and since then still less insulin has been needed, but not *quite* as less, if that makes sense.

So all the basals are re-set, the insulin lowered across the board…and yesterday E ran slightly high. Of course. In the 8’s and 9’s as opposed to where he is supposed to be, which would be in the 5’s, 6’s and 7’s.

If the same thing happens today, we will tweak down just a tad, and hope this doesn’t send him crashing… It feels a relief however for him not to be having hypo after hypo, and suffering from that kind of wipe-out.

He’s just suffering from the usual pooped-ness now, along with everyone else! Sleeping as I write this…

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