Okay so R is now in Japan. Has been there for 5 days, back in four. Having a fab time, taking lots of pictures, and really reveling in the extreme aesthetic differences. Would love to be there with him…! We skype in the odd in-between times, the miraculous hour when it’s not the middle of the night for him or us… This generally falls in the afternoon. In fact one day I shot home from work for half an hour just to see how visiting Kyoto went! So the children have only spoken to him once in all this time. For a family that talks — alot — this has been decidedly odd. And I imagine E especially misses his presence: it’s hard to overstate how much young men need their dads. And in E’s case, he depends on his dad’s objectivity, his clear-thinking, his rock-solid reassurance (the only one E really believes, I know this) around anything to do with diabetes. So it’s probably doubly stressful.
Though everyone’s generally holding up well.
Except for the uh… hour long hypos.
So this exact thing has happened two nights running: a short dual wave (dripping insulin in) for pizza in one instance, fries/chips in the other. (Here I reveal my almost complete lack of cooking skills: we are all struggling with fairly naff food, being used to the dreamboat and exceedingly healthy, home-cooked stuff of R… Ack.) ANYWAY (again), short dual waves. Which usually cause no problem. So an hour after each ends, there’s a plummeting hypo. A very bad one. Taking not one, or two, or three, but FOUR treatments over the hour to sort. E’s fairly swimming in apple juice, and ill from jellied sweets. The adrenalin has kicked in, and he’s panicky, upset, cross…
And who can blame him. Really, really, really a DRAG.
Then, having sorted the long hypo from the night before, yesterday morning I walked into his room and smelled it for the first time: pear drops. Sweets. I sniffed his bin. No, wasn’t that. I sniffed his covers. No, wasn’t that. I realised with a sinking, guilty heart that it was him, his breath. And that this meant he had possibly dangerous ketones. That he would be sky-high, and had been for hours.
Choice words, and crashing guilt. He was high indeed: 17 mmols.
In the event, the high cleared quickly. I signed him off PE (unsafe at 14 mmols plus), and by lunch he was in range. We communicated throughout by text.
Last night the same thing happened. Not just a funny turn then. Something going actually wrong. Four hypo treatments in the space of an hour. I got up in the night (because of the night before) and boy I was glad I did…Once again, he was 17 mmols. I corrected, and by morning he was still too high, but in a more sensible range, 11 mmols.
This is my theory, and R concurs (skype this afternoon!): first, his dinner ‘ratio’ (eg how much insulin needs to be given for each 10g of carbohydrate) needs tweaking. On the pump, ratios are set for different times of day and different meals, depending on insulin sensitivity. For us, traditionally dinner has needed the least amount of insulin (I think this is common?), and it is also the one meal that we change the ratios for quite frequently.
Second, the treatment of the hypos is inefficient. He almost always treats hypos with juice in the first place. Juice is very efficient, enters the bloodstream quickly. He doesn’t like, however, to drink LOADS of juice. So he chose to alternate the juice treatment with fruit pastilles.
The problem was, he was ‘dropping’. This meant that the peak of the insulin was not yet reached when he went hypo (this peak is around 2.5 hours after a dose, or in the case of dual waves, about 1.5 hours after it ends). So it was not a question of ‘recovering’ from a low, it was a question of keeping from going lower… Which didn’t work, both times. Both times he dropped like a stone.
I think I’m pretty clear that fruit pastilles simply aren’t quick enough in for that situation… They don’t work, so you treat again, it sort of works, but you must treat again…My thought is that they kick in well after they need to, stack up, and… result in a scorching high later on.
So. In that situation, no more pastilles. Just juice, just direct sugar. I feel sure that the lows could have been controlled sooner if only we’d stuck with juice instead of alternating with pastilles.
And we’ve changed the dinner ratio. And no dual wave tonight. So we’ll see what happens.
Sigh.
***
It may not surprise you to know that today, instead of marking or doing any number of other domestic and work-related things, I’ve just had a little breather: I met my dear friend Nancy for breakfast, and then later made a spontaneous appointment for the second manicure of my life. My fingernails are now a glorious deep teal blue. E says he’s ‘never really got why girls paint their fingernails’ — and I can sort of relate. I don’t really get it either.
But it is quite unadulterated fun. When I picked M up from school, she saw my nails and said, under her breath so as not to draw attention to them/her/me: how cool are they? how cool are THEY?
Here is a girl who relaxes by lying in a bubble bath, a bowl of chocolate on the side and an audio book playing. She’s as chaotic and non-girly and wacky-arty (seriously more so) than I am. But she gets it, which must be some kind of parenting triumph!

Looks black but is really deep blue/green...My eyes have barely a wrinkle -- but my hands look my age!


10 comments
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January 21, 2011 at 11:42 pm
tamsindonner
oh, MAN, patty, sounds like you managed the NASA of diabetic chaos very well indeed. thank god e. has two parents who understand not only music, literature, poetry, composition but also chemistry, physics, higher math, instrumentation and EVERYTHING else. i hope he feels more secure with you now, as secure as he does with his da. still, though, you are right, i bet: a guy needs a father around, esp. one who can cook like R. his meals live on in my mind.
and i LOVE the nails. is that an OPI polish or what? those dark tinged with black colors are all the rage here, too. i got a deep purple holo’d with cobalt blue with some glitter (wet’n'wild, 39 cents on sale) to match the color part of my new wheelchair. the old one just stopped running one day.
rec: glycerin based, goopy stuff put on damp hands to save them. or even petroleum jelly. essential to put on damp hands. hmmm. i see i have run far afield of diabetes and i am sorry. truth to tell, you long ago went over my head with your knowledge you are so so smart.
esp hilarious description of M.
tam
January 22, 2011 at 8:04 am
Lisa Nelsen
You know I love reading whatever you write… It’s like we’re all there with you. It really hits in the centre of my chest, but thank you so much for sharing! With all our lives running around all over the place, and having the dimension of actually having children along side a pretty extreme career,…and having time for nails… Love it! You are doing fine. Enjoy R’s return!! And love to you all! xxxx
January 22, 2011 at 10:09 am
jkb
I love the nails too! and I loved the update on the kittens. I just wanted to tell you that although sometimes there may be few comments, many people just like me take pleasure in reading what you write, about diabetes and about absolutely nothing to do with diabetes. You began this blog to help cope wih the new life your family was forced to begin, but like everything else it evolves and comes to a happier place. Always take time out for little ‘me’ things – you’re doing a wonderful job, in everything you do. I appreciate the most aptly chosen title of your blog, and know that you will, if you have not already, appreciate its irony: we do not drown; we are too strong for that.
Happy days to you and yours, Patricia
January 22, 2011 at 10:26 am
Patricia Debney
Okay I think it’s incredible that you can recognise OPI nail polish tam! You are correct! I also got some cuticle oil that you kind of paint on… Honestly. And because my nails were painted, for half an hour everyone had to do EVERYTHING for me. Which was good!
Lisa: how lovely to hear from you. Really always glad to know you are there. Thank you.
jkb: a lump to my throat. Thank you. There’s something essential about community. Something I never would have known about otherwise. And as you say, it’s not just diabetes community, though that’s the practical drive: it’s also just humanity-driven. Just being together in some way…. So anyway. Really one of the nicest and most direct comments I’ve ever had. Appreciated.
January 22, 2011 at 2:48 pm
Julie Maddison
Your email arrived at just the right time – once again E and my beautiful daughter are running with the same problems. It never ceases to amaze me how just when I think we have a “handle” on the diabetes thing it turns upside down and so does our whole family life until we hit the next stable patch.
Love the nails, I have to confess my treat last week was a pedicure – heaven!
Julie
January 22, 2011 at 4:54 pm
Valerie
I beg to differ that your hand look your age. And even so, women at our age can be quite FABULOUS in many ways! A friend recently cracked me up when she said: “You know, older men really let themselves go….”
January 22, 2011 at 6:14 pm
Patricia Debney
Hello all!
Julie: it *is* kind of strange how our two seem to go through similar things at similar times… Where do you live? How old is your beautiful daughter?
I do hear though that similar unexplained shifts in needs happen to lots of people with diabetes at once… It’s all so mysterious. If there’s one thing diabetes does is teaches you to roll with the punches….
Val, I LOVE your friend’s words! Not that it applies at all to my gorgeous older man, but it does apply, ahem, to some. Thanks for compliment re my hands: I am noticing age spots creeping up, though. Eek!
xxoo
January 23, 2011 at 12:03 pm
Steve
Enjoyed catching up on the blog this morning. Sounds like the days (and nights) have had their challenges. It is good to take time to detox, so to speak. While I myself am not into painting my nails, I do like the idea of having everything done for me, so I may have to take it up. (In my mind’s eyes, I hear my wife laughing and asking in disbelief: Really?)
January 23, 2011 at 12:14 pm
shiv
One of the parents was explaining to me why using lucozade/full sugar coke is better than juice, as in it works faster – excuse my lack of science knowledge but the juice has 2 glucose molecules, a pure glucose molecule and a fructose molecule, whereas lucozade etc just has pure glucose. The body has to break down the fructose molecule as well as the glucose – so juice takes longer to work.
Hope E is doing okay! Your nails look fab!
January 23, 2011 at 4:43 pm
Patricia Debney
Hi shiv and Steve
Steve: you could do the toenails?! Great to see you. Hope you and yours are well.
Shiv: this makes so much sense. We’ve been hamstrung from the start by E not liking lucozade or anything fizzy… I’m really hoping this will improve. Uh.
All much better here except for the odd weird blip — about to post in any case…
xxoo